Commitment

Commitment:

What a long word.  There are three m’s in there! What a complex word. Nice suffix“ment” at the end. What a wonderful word.  The word I’ve been waiting to truly and ultimately fulfill for over 10 years.  Commitment.

In the past few years, I’ve made many commitments in my life. Some I’d consider fairly major, while others fairly minor.  My first was my commitment to graduate from college.  I told myself and my family that I wanted a college degree.  And soooo, I earned it.  The next major commitment was my first “real” job.  I thought student teaching helped me get ready for what I dipped my toes into back in 2008, but boy was I in for an awakening (not necessarily of the rude kind, but nevertheless, DANG!)  The next commitment: moving out on my own.  All of the sudden extra trips here and there became a little too expensive when the bills had to be paid and you had to eat.  Then, I committed to beginning the construction on my own home with Cruz.  Talk about a HUGE commitment!  I can clearly remember sitting in my townhome floor with a set of lined paper, a charcoal pencil and a house stencil trying to draw out to scale, the house of our dreams.  From this experience, I’ve learned that I am a VERY spatial individual.  From there, I committed my time to a graduate degree.  This was yet another goal I set for myself, because I wanted to become a better teacher and leader for the students that I taught and the ones that looked up to me.  I committed to a new-to-me car somewhere in this mix, which I am PROUD to say I will OWN in January 2014, hooray!  And in December of 2013, I committed to Cruz, and told him that I’d marry him on our front porch. 

Which leads me to the commitment that I made today; I am proud to say that I have SAID YES TO MY WEDDING DRESS.  Yes, folks, I jumped and landed myself a great find.  I must say that in this entire wedding planning process, the dress selection seemed to be a weeee bit overwhelming.  I watched about 1.5 million hours of Bride Day on TLC this summer (yikes!) and have been reading numerous blog posts, articles and other online sources about how to “Select  YOUR dream dress!” or “Bridal Gown Etiquette”.  Talk about confusing!  I guess I had just assumed you walked in, the bridal consultant threw you into a gown or dress and you were walking outta there happily ever after.  (Hey, that’s how it worked on TV!)  You see, I had planned this whole experience out in my head to include myself, my bridesmaids, my matron of honor and the mothers.  I envisioned all of us in comfy sweats, bouncing from bridal store to bridal store, sipping on some type of Muscato or Mimosa throughout the day, trying to outfit me in the “perfect dress”  The more I thought of this, the more I was afraid I’d be stuck trying to make a final decision.  I tend to lean toward the thoughts of others, and in some cases, I don’t find that trait to be so bad.  Buuut, in the process of selecting a bridal gown for myself, probably not the best idea.  

So in efforts to get an idea of what I really wanted, I began a random search at an unnamed bridal store on my own.  I went up and down the aisles and aisles of dresses.  There were white, ivory, beaded, organza, lace, taffeta, satin, mermaid-style, fit-and-flare, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah!  Goodness GRACIOUS the choices brides are given when trying to figure out what to wear on her wedding day!  I ended up snapping a few pics with my iPhone and did online searches for reviews for particular gowns that somewhat interested me.  The prices weren't too awful bad, but the reviews for customer service, for alterations and other items of interest were not par for the course.  (Love a good, honest person when it comes to product review!) 

I called up my matron of honor, had her meet me at Southern Bride in Yadkinville, NC and went to looking.  As soon as I walked into the boutique, I was greeted with the two most genuinely nice women.  They asked me the questions to try and get a feel of what I was going for.  From that point on, it was me, the consultant and my MOH.  I got into gowns, I came out of gowns, I had hair pieces added and taken away, I had belts added and taken away.  It was like playing dress up with a full grown adult. I had tried on about 8 or so dresses and had found one that I hadn’t really been that excited to try on originally, but LOVED the way it fit and felt on.  With all the details of the dress a secret, I can’t share tooooo much, but I was very excited about a unique design that fit me right off the rack (with a few alternations at the top, mostly!)  The best part was that, I had selected a gown that was going to be marked for 40% off.  Now if you know me, I am ALL ABOUT THE DEAL and ALL ABOUT THE CHEAP.  I can’t pass up a great buy.  I knew I didn’t want to spend a fortune, and had a particular amount saved up for a dress.  How lucky had I gotten?  A deal AND it fits overall?  I knew I needed one more look to be done, so I bid the wonderful staff goodnight at Southern Bride and made an appointment to return this morning.

Talk about Pinterest on OVERLOAD.  Ya'll, I spent most of Friday night looking and pinning ideas for hair, pinning dresses somewhat similar to the ones I had tried on and like the one that I was about 99.9% sure I wanted.  I tried searching for the SKU model numbers of the designers I tried on to see if I could find a better deal online.  I tried searching for themes like the one I have pictured in my mind for our wedding.  No matter how hard I tried, I kept seeing this one, particular unique dress.  At 4:00 am, I woke up and CONTINUED to think about this dress.  I showered, did laundry and still had it on my mind.  Then, I knew that this HAD to be the one.  There came the word again…commitment.  I had unintentionally committed myself to a dress, and once mothers viewed it, HAD TO HAVE IT.

10 am rolled around and my appointment began.  I slipped into my cowboy boots and threw the dress on again.  With my aunt on call from California via FaceTime and the mothers ready, I was able to debut what I had found.  A few tears later and some “Oohs” and “Aaahs” as well as tons of photos taken, I said YES TO MY DRESS.  Although this gown is made of fabric, beading, lace and string, it’s also a symbol of a commitment.  Did I pick it because I thought I looked nice in it? Well, yes.  Did I choose it because others liked me in it? Sure, it was nice to hear complimentary things said about me.  Does it match PERFECTLY for my wedding? You bet, like right down to a "T".  But I committed because I want my hubby-to-be to feel like I dressed myself just for him on the day that we commit to each other.  I want this to be a lasting impression on him forever.  I want this to be a memory that neither of us will never forget.

So stay tuned, friends.  Our date is set for September 26^th, 2014.  Countdown to commitment: Well, currently, 306, but hey, who's counting? =)